Jan.3 2025

 I think writing the title for this blog post was the first time it really clicked that it is 2025. It's the first time that I have written it down. I feel like I haven't really focused or taken the time to think about the New Year. I feel like I have a whole bunch of thoughts that I don't want to address lol. 

New year. New goals right? But I don't know what my goals "should" be. I don't know how to make goals, know what they should be, how to approach them etc. 

Make more money. get skinnier. Work out every day. Read scriptures. Serve. been the same thing for 35 years. I feel mixed up with my constant need to achieve goals, work hard, accomplish things, grow and learn and then my also fear of failure, by tired feeling of pursuit, the repetitive feeling of goals, the "once again" feeling of the New Year.  The back and forth of peace and pursuit. The redundancy of the repetition. The I should do better vs the I'm doing great and want to just continue with my good habits and the good things I am already doing. 

So yup there we have it, a minute inside my brain and the "every direction" at once it's constantly going at. 

Christmas was great. Thomas Dad came for a few days, and then Janae came on Monday the 30th. We did New Years Eve with the Arnolds and Janae. It was fun. We played lots of games, did some sledding, ate some good food and just all around had a good time. 

Work at my new job has been pretty good, but also interesting and challenging. I hope that I can learn the ropes a bit more and feel more confident with everything. I look forward to all that this new year brings with all the ups and downs and challenges and growth. 

I do know one thing. My word of the year is "Christ". In years past and I'm sure in years in the future I will have different words, but every year I feel really strongly what my word of the year is supposed to be. Sometimes it takes a while before it becomes clear, but once I finally  reach it and find the word, it usually hits me with a lot of clarity. So my word of the year is "Christ" and I am excited so see what that all means for me and how it will unfold. My biggest desire right now is to learn and grow closer to Christ by study and prayer.